Our trip to Florence, a city filled with immense history and enough art to prompt Stendahl Syndrome in an art history buff, had a perplexing effect on me. I thoroughly enjoyed my date with David, viewing the sunset from the top of the duomo, and our group dinner at Trattoria Zaza, but this weekend excursion allowed me to see the city of Rome from refreshed eyes. Before we left, I was in some sort of a funk, in a sense Rome had begun to seem like home, the bustling city somehow felt and mundane, standard and increasingly uninteresting. I had adjusted to the routine, frequenting the same grocery stores and gelato shops and subconsciously deciding that I knew the city and had experienced it fully.
Seeing Florence for the first time was a flashback to when I first arrived in Rome. Experiencing these new surroundings brought out the accompanying energy to explore, to wander alone and observe, to try new food and support the local economy by perusing the repeating market stalls filled with similar leather goods and purchasing intriguing trinkets. Having this abbreviated trip as a reminder that I am here as a traveler inspired a rejuvenated sense of curiosity within me. It made me realize that I have six weeks left to experience the Eternal City and the other parts of Europe that strike my fancy. I reevaluated my goals and my reasons for being here and made a list of what I would still like to, learn, see, and accomplish (aside from what is required in class) while I am here, and this is what I came up with.
1. Gain an increased tolerance and understanding of those around me and learn to communicate effectively and evaluate how others view my behavior
2. Learn how to see places and people in a different way, giving things unbiased second chances
3. Climb the dome of St. Peter’s cathedral on a sunny day
4. Visit the Capucin Crypt
5. Go to an AS Roma soccer game
6. Go to the Porta Portese flea market
7. Spend an entire weekend day wandering the city alone taking pictures
8. Gain confidence in my ability to travel by taking one weekend or overnight trip outside of Rome alone (Amalfi coast after Naples? Fly to Cadiz, London, Istanbul, or Amsterdam?)
Six weeks is a long time, plenty of time to accomplish or at least attempt to accomplish these tasks, and I am so grateful for this chance to reevaluate my goals by leaving the place that had become comfortable. I know that the next six weeks will seem like they pass in a blink of an eye and that I simply need to enjoy them and extract as much as possible from this journey of a lifetime.
On another note, this trip to Florence was particularly interesting socially. Personally, I am used to living in a house with 100 girls, so living in an apartment with 9 was a warmly welcomed break. But traveling with 14 different people is a completely different story. Being separated from familiar surroundings and constrained by transportation schedules seems to either bring out the worst characteristics in people or simply cause me to notice them. Maybe it was the increased time spent together or living next door to everyone in the program. Regardless, I felt increased tension amongst the group, and I blamed it on everyone else, THEY were the ones with irritating behaviors, THEY were the ones being irrational, THEY were the ones causing conflict.
Reading the excerpt from The Others got me thinking about my behavior, and I realized that I inherently assume that I am right, that my point of view is the only valid one, and that I make the best decisions. I inherently consider those different from myself as “others”. I realized that I am so quick to judge, so quick to criticize. I forget that people are simply a product of their upbringing and surroundings, that people do the best that they can in regards to what they have to work with, so to speak. Granted, this isn’t an excuse for immoral or unlawful behavior, just an explanation of some sort. I cannot count the number of times that I have judged prematurely, forming my opinions based simply on MY point of view, later to find out that there was a reason for their behavior or words.
In the words of Forrest Gump, “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get.” Everyone has a story. Some people are blessed with more challenges in life than others. I have come to find that the people who I respect most are not the ones who make the best impressions upfront, whose lives look good on paper. The people that I admire are the ones who are able to make changes in the cycle of their environment, who come from a dysfunctional family but are able to support a healthy home life for their own children, who graduate from high school while having to work to support their families, who stay positive despite their situation. I admire and envy this resiliency. But often these special people go unnoticed or are criticized for their faults. I cannot count the number of times that I have prematurely judged someone, only to later learn their story and gain an enormous amount of respect for them. I have come to understand that the only way to avoid this is one of my most apparent flaws, listening. It is impossible to discover someone’s story without paying attention to their voice, without watching their actions, and inquiring about their origins.
Traveling to Florence provided me with a perfect experience of the possible benefits reaped from leaving somewhere and coming back. Geographically, we left Rome for Florence, and when we returned I brought with me a new sense of curiosity and adventure. But more importantly, I realized that in many situations where I deal with people different from myself, it is necessary for me to emotionally leave the situation for some time and then come back. By taking time alone, evaluating the position that I am in as well as those around me, I am able to see the situation in an environment where I am not being directly affected by the events, to make decisions not based on emotion but sound reasoning. Though this can be difficult to do, it helped me thrive in the stressful environment in Florence, and I plan to practice this coping tactic in the future.
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